You might have seen an Instagram video of a little boy who went viral last year for his ability to recognise his emotions and talk about his big feelings with his Mum. If you haven’t, you should absolutely watch it here… I promise, you’ll be just as impressed as we all were! This is a beautiful illustration of the value of teaching children about their mental health and empowering them to regulate their emotions from a young age – a skill we’ll all need to master throughout our lives. This video also showed the world that regardless of race, no one is too young to learn about mental health.
The concept of a lifespan approach to mental health promotion certainly includes providing older children (4 – 9 years) with the right environment and tools to protect and manage their mental health positively. Years of research have revealed that most of these responsibilities rest on parents and caregivers. Reliability and consistency, empathy and sensitivity to the child, and being able to help that child express and manage emotions are invaluable contributions that parents and caregivers must make.
Common Risk Factors to look out for
According to the Directory of Projects in the European Union document on “Mental Health Promotion for Children up to 6 Years”, here are three categories of factors that typically negatively impact mental wellness in children;
- Biological and medical risk factors
- Children with severe or chronic illness, particularly those in hospital
- Children with very low birth weight or poor growth
- Children with disabilities
- Children with genetic or chromosomal abnormalities
- Parental or psycho-social risk factors
- At least one parent whose vulnerabilities affect their capacity to care for their children
- Violent or abusive family environment
- Severe discord, family breakdown and loss of parental contact
- At least one parent with mental health problems, including drug and alcohol addiction and depression
- Demographic and socio-political risk factors
- Poverty or socio-economic deprivation
- Refugees or exile
- Poor housing or homelessness
It’s important to remember that certain factors at school and other learning environments can cause a child’s mental health to suffer. Situations such as bullying, emotional or sexual abuse from teachers as well as unfair comparisons and shaming of children based on academic performance can easily play a role here. We’ll discuss this further in subsequent articles.
How can you help?
As a concerned adult, parent or caregiver, you may be wondering, “How can I help these precious kids? How can I protect them from some of these risks and equip them to healthily manage their emotions when they face difficulties?” Here are 5 ways that you can incorporate mental health promotion strategies into thier lives to help keep them safe.
- Be Present and consistent
Whether you’re a parent or caregiver, children benefit so much from the constant, consistent and reliable presence of parent figures. This makes them feel safe, protected and supported. They need to know that they will not be abandoned by you. Although a two-parent household is ideal, a single parent who is dependable and present is still indispensable. That sense of safety allows children to develop healthy psychological patterns. This is even more important when such children have chronic medical conditions or health problems that already cause them emotional difficulties.
- Be Regulated and Engaged
This is such an important strategy because the constant presence of parents or parent figures loses its value when such adults are emotionally dysregulated, distant, distracted, selfish or creating a toxic family dynamic. In such environments, children hardly ever cope well and may struggle mentally well into adulthood. This means that we must first confront our trauma, seek treatment for our struggles (addictions, depression, Anxiety disorder etc.) and learn to regulate our emotions so we can create a safe space for the children in our lives.
- Be a Positive Example
No matter how positive and supportive your home is, remember it won’t always be sunshine and rainbows. There will be conflicts, disagreements, financial troubles, work stress, and strenuous academic demands on the children, and as adults, we need to be able to model healthy emotional regulation in these situations. Never raising voices during arguments, taking a walk to regulate our feelings, cultivating gratitude, speaking respectfully, expressing disappointments calmly, scolding children with kindness, and staying hopeful are some great ways to model healthy responses to your children.
Whether you’re facing financial hardships, sickness or a natural disaster, show them that it’s okay to express frustration and that they can get through tough situations as external circumstances do not define thier value.
- Be Sensitive and Empowering
Listen to your children and allow them to express themselves. Always be curious about what they’re thinking and feeling. You can lead by expressing your thoughts or asking questions about their day and allowing them to respond. And when they’re expressing themselves, please listen intently. These conversations are a goldmine for assessing their mental and emotional states. If they say things like “I’m not as pretty as Mary,” or “I want my friends to like me,” then you can identify the areas in which they need help, investigate the roots of those feelings and empower them with affirming words.
- Be vigilant: Filter their Exposure and Associations
In such an intensely social world, parents need to be more vigilant about who and what children are exposed to. You might need to reconsider raising them in violent neighbourhoods or in toxic school settings. Things like access to social media, TV shows and books should be tightly moderated to protect them from predatory attention, and inappropriate content. It’s also important to filter what family members are safe to be around and listen to your children when they express discomfort with a teacher, family member or friend. This can help protect them from possible physical and sexual abuse.
It’s true that you really cannot shield children from every negative aspect of society, but you can do your best to create a healthy environment in which they can thrive and feel safe, while affirming them and handing them the tools they need to face challenges and manage their emotions properly.
References
- “Mental Health Promotion for Children up to 6 Years” report, Directory of Projects in the European Union, published by Mental Health Europe, Liaison Office for the European Network on Mental Health Promotion.